I’m in fl being a huge dyke.

I got so drunk at the airport that I hit on a flight attendant and got my flight upgraded to direct and business class.

Unfortunately I was way too fucked up to enjoy business class and passed out.

The company that “paid” for this picture still hasn’t paid me. Fuck you pay me.

So heres a picture of me naked.

Because I feel like posting a picture of me naked.

I would appreciate it if you could all start donating to my stripper pole fund.

Thanks.

I’d write about Yumna but I’m not allowed to anymore. In fact she was actually a figment of my dykey imagination.

Space Cowboy - My Egyptian Love + Acid + vibrator = crazy

• I spent the morning of the 24 puking for about eight hours straight due to food poisoning. Family came over for dinner and I almost passed out during desert. Awesome!
• My mother gave me a coffee maker. I do not drink coffee[avid tea drinker] but she brought it so that when she comes to my apartment she can drink coffee. Apparently the thing of instant coffee I keep around isn’t good enough. It’s kind of hilarious in  a way I suppose..
• On the other hand I got some ill gifts - a shit ton of nozzles for spray painting from my brother and a le tigre dress I had my eye on and told my mother. The way that thing hugs my body without being revealing - dammmmn girl.
• And my gifts were well loved - I brought my mom an assortment of nice lotions that she would probably kill me if she knew how much I spent on them. Only the best of the best for Mommy though!
• Also Pee Wee Herman - no wonder I’m so fucking gay. GAY GAY GAY. I’m sorry. I’m just loving the word Gay lately. You know what todays secret word of the day is? GAY. You know what you do when I say GAY. SCREAM. GAY AHHHHHH.
• I want to smuggle my parents cat Tippy home because he is so overweight and awesome but every time they catch me bagging him they yell at me. But seriously he’s just like a giant cuddle monster pillow.

I mean really
HOW COULD THAT NOT MAKE YOU HAPPY
Just cont on with it via YouTube - the WHOLE christmas special is there!
Yay!

oh
my
god

This video turns me on. So much Russian hotness.
I’ve never seen a woman look sexier pregnant.

Seriously locking my bedroom tonight.

Soulsavles @ the Annex:

lovey

My apt:

My LOVES:

xo

I just wanted to say Hi! to my readers @ indierotica.com where I am now syndicated.

To celebrate here are my favorite pictures Jess has taken of me:

My first jello shot! @ Nouveau back when that party existed.

The go go gets artistic

On a break.

MONEY MONEY MONEY MOTHERFUCKASSSSSSSSS

And lastly the infamous Brendon James Bitch portrait:

I leave you all with the news that tonight Frog is breaking my Pacha cherry and Trash will be back in January.

xo Baby

PS you see the feed here 

At this point in my life I think the only person I can love is myself.
Boyfriends always prove to be nothing worth having.

I think it might be time for me to leave
and thank god I have tickets to Fl on December 28…
I want my friends and family to be happy but I don’t know what to do.

Lately I feel like this:

I don’t know, maybe it’s seasonal. The lack of light.

And in other news my Christmas list:

• A fridge full of sugar free red bulls and these :
• Creepy Kewpie cell phone charms! I’m personally feeling the anorexic one:
• Stripper pole for my bedroom. And not a cheap one, I’m talking club quality($300)…. It would be so totally awesome.
• Anything off my Kaboodle! Add me if your on it…I need more BFFs on it.
• plaid shirts
• A new comforter.
• A new ipod!

I wish I could post all my cute gifts I got for Wolf and my family.

When I went to the Bust Craft Fair not only did I spend waaay too much money[handmade bond girl ruffled underwear? WHY NOT]…I SAW AMY SEDARIS.
And
I got STAR STRUCT
This has Never Happened to ME. EVER. I’ve been around famous people good enough and they never faze me.
But Amy, oh my god I love that women. I couldn’t even bring myself to talk to her. i was to nervous and at a loss for words. It took me forever to even go NEAR her booth. This has never happened to me.
I did buy a dope calendar from her though!
I mean how can you not love this woman:

I grew up watching Strangers with Candy. If I’m this cool at her age my life will be a sucess.

Please tell me about times when you’ve been Star Stuct?

So I finally gave in to my curiosity and brought the notorious sex toy…the rabbit.

Maybe it’s the fact that the Sex and the City Trailer was just released. Maybe it’s the fact that I’ve been curious about this fucking thing years. None the less, I was Christmas shopping and impulse brought a Rabbit.

Within a few minutes of having it in me .. I orgasmed. It was good …. just uh …. you know how there’s an orgasm and than There’s an ORGASM. It was the former.

The rabbit is like fast food for you sex drive. It’s quick, it’s cheap* and satisfying but you know there’s better.

You know there’s higher quality sex toys out there that don’t reference childhood petting zoos. You know the true satisfaction that comes from building up an orgasm? You don’t get that with the rabbit. It’s quick and easy. Too Easy.

So it looks like I’m still more a Kiki De Montparnass girl than a 24 hour sex store on 8th ave girl when it comes to toys.

PS as far as KDM goes…I’m soooo lusting this! Can you imagine? It’s sooo decadent! I love the platform…put your sexuality out there people and fucking display it on a shelf. Just don’t forget to dust it! Or this..how gorgeous! They’re lingerie is stunning as well…I must stop by their store sooner rather than later.

In other sex toy news I still haven’t received my Hello Kitty vibrator! Ugh I hate ebay and the Bushwick postal services. Complications…. I just want my Hello Kitty vibrator… It’s going to look so perfect next to me Hello Kitty tv when I get it!

Christmas is so lovely. I absolutely adore buying gifts for my family and friends and than packaging them all lovely. I went shopping today and got about 1/2 done with my shopping. I need more ribbons and paper though.

Sigh

I just absolute adore Christmas in NYC. It’s so much fun going to the special fairs[union sq, grand central, Bust if I make it…]. And the snow just looks so magical against the decorations. And the windows! Oh the windows…I’ve yet to go looking yet but as a child I would always go see a few windows and a musical almost every December.

Happy Holidays and Sexing!

xo Baby S.

*cheap = under $80….sorry!