Word on the streets of New York City is that American Apparel has made the jump from sexually explicit advertising to actually selling sex toys. Now lets think for a second; if you were Dov Charney would you sell some neon jelly rabbit? Or a silver bullet to match those shiny leggings?

Or an infamous back massager that’s been getting people off in more ways than one since the 70’s?

Yes, that’s right now in stores - the Hitachi Magic Wand.

I think for a company that pulls on retro styling for their clothing line and enjoys being suggestively sexual in their advertising, it makes perfect sense. A lot of people find it a bit weird that AA carries magazines, sharpies and Swiss Army knives but, if anything, it’s another intelligent marketing scheme to help people make impulse purchases and give the store some sort of “hipster” credibility.

Throw this in with the fact that Walgreen’s sells “massagers” as well, and Trojan has started pushing an intimate fingertip vibrator. I think we’re well on our way to a society where sex toys are not taboo and that this can only help us create a more sex positive country.

I am going to hit Ariel with this vibrator.

I supply amazing props like unicorn folders for all shoots. Hire me!

I love this girl.

This one too.

I’m out for the day. If you want to catch me tonight go to the Burning Angel book release party at Savalas or hit up Arlos & Esme where Sweatshop Labor are spinning and Bronques is hosting.

I think I might be on my way to becoming  famous.

• Andy Warhols framer framed my tits for a gallery show.
• I’m making my second music video debut, this time for N.E.R.D. and they’ve put up a preview of it:

Yeah I’m that idiot with really lame knuckle tattoo…like who would get something so trite on they’re knuckles like, they’re totally going to regret it in three months. On a non sarcastic note I’m real proud to see Bronques doing so well…I remember when we first met……. I was supposed to go have tea with someone I met at the shoot today and I totally forgot because I felt like shit all day, I also missed a gallery opening. Behind the scenes of the shoot:

You can see Pharrells hilarious attempt at hardcore dancing better in this one:

Emmmm boys moshing. Always gets me…
Someone needs to post video footage of Pharrell accidently getting punched. Shit was hilarious.

Last night I hung out with the Sweatshop Labor crew at Savalas. The music was good, the drinks got me drunk and I shook my ass a lot. There was also a lot of meleasting of people going on. Meanwhile my new hobby of taking random pictures of dicks on my BB is working out well. I almost left my underwear at the Sweatshop Labor loft.

Just took a bath with my vibrating duckie and a lush bomb. Gonna finish watching the Kit Runner and clean for Mommys day!!!

Good night!

Ok so went to Trash last night and Joanna did her awesome adorable burlesque show and rubbed whipped cream all over me. Whipped cream dries just like gizz, I swear…I mean if the porn business needs something to replace cetephil, I guess whipped cream might work. It was awesome to see a bunch of angels - Dusty, Nico, Joanna and Doug[I’m naming him an honoary angel thru this blog hahahah]. I love my girls. The new location is SO MUCH BETTER. I mean I love Home Sweet Home with all it’s taxidermy creatures running amuck but it just wasn’t the home for Trash. 40 ave C is great - comfy tables for hosts, a stage, back room for doing dirty things, nice barstaff. Joanna put out a softcore horror movie dvd, here’s an interview about it and BA:

After Trash which was have mad cop probs, went to a house party at Kelloggs. Things got crazy. I wilded out.
The party tonight has a weird dress code:

I will not obey most likely. I mean I just got a new MOB sweatshirt - I think I want to rock out in pjs and a sweatshirt. Except I don’t own pjs. So I’m gonna be naked in a MOB sweatshirt.

In other Alt porn news the great Eon McKai sent me a box of vivid alt porn and I’ve been watching porn since yesterday afternoon non-stop[with a break for partying]. Vivid Alt really puts out some great porn - here are the trailers from the porn I’ve been watching:

This movie is just awesome because of how real it is.

OMG the Dallas music video is hilarious.

It was also awesome that my girl Pixie Pearl is in half of these movies! I miss you so much, can someone hook this girl up with a phone or plant her in my apt asap!?

I really love that VA includes a dope soundtrack with each movie. I like music. Especially now that I’ve discovered wtf blog house is. Blog house is apparently all that I listen to. Thank you Frog for installing my curtain rod. And Chris for dealing with insanity that is me.
I still have dried whipped cream on my face.
Icky!

Day One:

Land in LAX - my blackberry was crackberrying out and not turning on so it took me awhile to reach her and get picked up from the airport. Kelly Lind shot three solo sets of me which was really fun - he’s a great photographer. Joanna and I shot a set and video together which involves not only a Burning Angel sex toy but also a toilet plunger as a butt plug. The thing is though Joannas toilet plunger mysteriously looks like a butt plug. I’m going to be hitting up Bed Bath & Beyond for one ASAP.

Day Two:

I shot my first ever boy girl scene and interracial although I think it’s weird that people won’t fuck black guys. That first interracial scenes are considered something special or a big deal weirds me out. Where do you draw the line of between fetishism and racism? So I’m glad my first one was interracial so it’s never a big deal. The guy had a really cute mohawk and we shot in Joanna’s closet[which is the size of some of my friends bedrooms in NYC]. The closet is awesome - neon green with a robot on the wall.

Joanna cooked an insane feast and Tommy Pistol and his wife came over to eat with us. The food was soooo good, I haven’t had a home cooked meal in forever!

Day Three:

I got my makeup and hair done all awesome as you all saw here. Also I wore a red latex dress - did you know you can use lube to clean latex and make it look nice? Learn something new everyday. I did a scene in this amazing art loft in East LA with Mick Blue - who officially has the best accent ever and totally gets into the scene. The members at Burning Angel all think that our guys aren’t “punk rock” enough. And I’ve decided that if you all don’t approve of Mick that I’m not talking to you. For like a day. But seriously he’s so hot and fucks way better than the majority of hipster boys…sorry hipster boys…I still love you, lets go listen to Morrissey and wear glasses without lenses while reading Vice.

After dinner I got to watch the first half of Fuck Me in The Bathroom TWO - it hasn’t been released yet but let me tell you…when it is - buy it. Not just for the sex but for the hilarious interviews.

Day Four:

I was going to wake up and watch the second half of FMINB2 but I slept in instead. We went to Beauty Bar LA to shoot. I got amazing hair and makeup done - think Blondie with a beehive. Took awesome pictures and than had really fucking good sex with Alex in the mens bathroom. The scene was very hot. Actually all my scenes were and I can’t wait to see them.

We had dinner at some bar and everyone was loud, wearing green and drinking green beer.

When we got home I went on my email than James walked in with a video camera and I ended up going down on him with Joanna and than filming her getting fucked in the ass by him.

We went to Tonga Bar, a tiki bar to celebrate St Patricks day. The drinks were free and I got kind of drunk. Oh and I made a new gay bestfriend!

When we got home I was pretty drunk apparently. James apparenlty told me to go under the cabinets and I did but I was so drunk and confused…I didn’t even remember this till James told me.

Ok I have to add this in since it’s hilarious, it’s from Joannas blog:

“I listened to nothing but the Dropkick Murphy’s on St.Patricks day and at night me and Sinead went to some tiki bar and drank things that were green. I am not irish but Sinead is. She taught me the meaning of St.Patricks day. It turns out it isn’t just about getting drunk and dressing in a green outfit, it’s also about snakes. See Patrick apparently- who wasn’t even Irish… he was Scottish or British no one even really knows- he drove the snakes out of Ireland. Apparently there used to be a lot of like, poisonous snakes there but there isn’t anymore. I guess that’s just as good of a reason to get drunk as anything else is. Sinead also told me that sometimes Irish baby’s get taken away and replaced with wooden sticks and when she was younger she tried to arrange for this kinda thing with her brother but it didn’t really work. It was pretty educational. I have a whole new respect for Irish people. Next st.Patty’s day I’m gonna go to Boston with Sinead. I look as far from Irish as you can possibly look but I don’t think anyone will care. Do you?”

Day Five:

Went on Sirrus radio with Joanna, we were on Tony Hawks radio station for the Jason Ellis show. I helped Joanna give the illusionist a hand job and than cum on my tits to makeup for not promoting Jason at AVN. It was kind of hilarious because Joanna was trying to video tape it but broke the camera and left the room. So I’m sitting there on my crackberry and bullshitting and the guy is gonna cum so I texted her “He’s gonna cum!!!” And she came back to the bathroom and he came on my tits.

Finished up packing than did Joannas webcam show with her. It was lots of fun, I stuck a finger in her butt and her fans are really sweet.

I filled out all my paperwork, and Joanna gave me a Burning Angel sex toy and Not Another Porn Movie. The Burning Angel bullet is really good. And I’m not usually a bullet girl but the vibrations are killer and the pink cracked design seals the deal. Oh and it’s water proof and phalate free!

We headed to the airport a bit tight on time but we thought I might make the flight but I accidentally got dropped off at Virgin Atlantic instead of Virgin America. Than I was given the wrong directions to America three times before I finally got there. There was so much running and dragging my insane amount of bags around that I was frantic and stressed beyond belief when I reached the ticket counter. I ran through security[not even bothering to put my sneaks back on, through the gates, the vendors till I got to my gate. Where I subsequently collapsed in front of the counter - partially in pain since my knee is still fucked up, and partially because I was anxious and have never missed a flight before. Ever. Fourtantly the kindess of strangers, Virgin Airline and Joanna all were incredibly helpful and sweet. A perfect stranger gave me ibuprofen and water and offered me a place to stay in DC if I was stuck there. The women was very sweet and checked on me a couple times. Things like that give me faith in people and reaffirm my belief in karma. I got a flight to DC and all the flight attendants were incredibly sweet since they had seen how upset I was - I was even given my own row of seats to myself…which if you know me, I love that.

Actually I love Virgin. It’s so cute. With their purple and hot pink lights, silly video, good air plane food…loves it.

The DC airport is really big. And security was worse than NYC. They spent a solid five minutes staring at my bags. Although now I’m looking back and realizing I have some weird shit in my carry on.

I think my cab ride home from the airport took more time than my flight from DC to NYC. I keep falling asleep in the cab[it was raining, I’m tired and cars put me to sleep = bad combo] and the guy DROVE INTO MANHATTAN. I live in Brooklyn!? WTFFFF $70 CAB RIDE. That’s ridiculous.

Now I’m back in nyc and it’s time for a shower, and some much needed Fungi and me time.

Everything I shot while I was out here will end up on Burning Angel, & Joanna Angel. So join those sites and get your hands ready.

I created a little page for my modeling and performing - right here. It’s under construction but check it anyways.

Also I just signed up with Hardcore Modeling which considering Model Mayhems lack of tolerance towards erotica/porn might turn out to be a worthwhile site. We’ll see.

I’m still hurt by my loss of my friendship with Yumna. She was the one I could alway confide in without worry about being judged or exploited. She was always the friend I shared everything in my life with, the good the bad, I wanted her there always. To not have her has created a hole in my heart.

I’m working through it though. I brought some new plants, and had a mini shopping spree at Lush….em nice yummy bath bomb filled bath times always make me feel better. I really need one of those vibrator rubber duckies already!!! oh and I got an acid wash black hoodie from AA.
None the less…I’m still heartbroken.

Photo by the Lovely Brenda.

I was going to write about weird kinks, how fucking AWESOME my Mom is, and the rubbing of ze taint but um I’m in bed, naked and ready to pass out.

So here are some new pics of me courtesy of Daze:

And that’s my bedroom btw. And yeah it always looks like that. Infact this is a fairly accurate representation of how I am right now. The big pink dildo is here, gloomy bears, fur blanket Just don’t have the hat on but you know what, maybe I should start wearing caps naked in bed on the regular.

I’ve been super busy lately and it’s not dying down anytime soon.

Poor Fungi, named not for the plural form of fungus but rather the killer Irish dolphin of Dingle, Fungie, I really must play with her more…

Um and you know what. My MOM IS AWESOME. We hung out today and discussed piercings[she hates belly but thinks the nips are cool], how babies having babies is so in for 08, and brought new vans together[she got slip ons and I got high top]. Seriously I love my Mom. She’s the best. She’s going to take training to start teaching a class for people with children and loved ones suffering from mental illness. So cool.

Ok I’ll talk of taints and kinks later.

xoxo

IT TOOK ME FUCKING TEN MINUTES TO DO THIS FUCK:

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This is a picture of a book stuck in my ass I took ten minutes ago:

I’d tell you about last night but I don’t remember much. So in the comments could you please tell me what happened last night.

I may of made out with a tranny - just want confirm/deny on this.

Also crawled under the gates of Home Sweet Home, this is confirmed.

“This is why you white girls always be in the news”

Ever just realize you dress semi like a hooker. That seems to happen a lot for me. Like shit this dress is too short so I pull it down but than I’m like shit this dress is too low cut so I pull it up and than I’m like shit I’m just fucked - anyone want a blowjob for $500?

In other news Patrick did my hair today:

B T W - it’s 3am so nevermind the face.

Also I brought a pink ball gag while picking up bleach and toner at Rickys:

Honestly it’s basically a glorified bouncy ball[I’m serious - I tested the bounce] but I’m still down for being gagged with it. It’s a really cute ball gag.

Patrick took some pictures of me gagged and doing some boot licking like the good little sub I can be at times. My period also just decided to like jump out while filming which was fucking annoying. Thank god for homegirl having a tampon. Menstrual cycles suck. Is this gross for me to be talking about? But you know what people it happens in porn, like all of a sudden you look at the girl next to you, the girl you’re about to fist and realize she’s bleeding so you shove a sponge up there and go about your business.

I hope you all remember this when I post the pictures of boot lickin.

Siiiiiiccccccckkkkkk.

Also while at Rickys one of clerks came into the ‘Adults Only Section’ and hits on me with a “Are you 18?” and I just stared at him confused[mostly because I had no proof of age on me] than he was like “Just kidding! Just wanted to tell you your super pretty - want a basket?” Weird. He had a grill though. Major points on that. Anytime someone with a grill hits on me, an angel gets its wings.

He tried to get my number as I was walking out but considering I wasn’t offered a discount … eef that!

Step. Ya. Game. Up.

Ummm I’m listening to Felix Da Housecat ‘Like Something 4 Porno’ … that is this blogs entrys soundtrack.

OUT

Ever just give yourself like a really good multiple orgasm while masturbating and just wanna give yourself a high five. Well. I just did. That’s all. Vaginas are so much fun. I would hate having a penis - I feel like boys can’t be as creative with their masturbation. Also once you blow your load your OUT. Girls on the other hand can masturbate for hours.

On that note I started an erotic wish list. You know, incase anyone wants to buy me…

Pear cuffs so you can restrain me and do whatever your please to me while I still look like a lady. I am also down with the collar and leash. Or there’s the…

The Cone. Seriously this thing is just crazy. I have to try it. It’s like sybian but better designed to not look so scary and less bulky so you can hide it under the bed…

Just so I can say I own a pink dolphin shape vibrator? Is that weird. Yea that is weird. But I own a Hello Kitty vibrator so how much weirder can I get.

I like this strap on because it’s so girly. Most are black and kind of intimidating.

More fun that wii ?

I’m kind of toying with the idea of making videos where I test out sex toys and rate them and actually have footage of me using them. Hmm.

Anyways lets make Christmas happen again peeps!

PS I think I MIGHT of nixed the stripper pole idea…I’m not real sure where to put it yet…