Lost a tooth. No joke.

I have a veneer and it came out.

It’s the tooth next to my two middle teeth.

This is not a good look.

I called my parents hysterical about this and am currently in hiding at their place upstate till I see a dentist.

I’m too vain to let anyone see my sans tooth.

I can’t rock the Amy Winehouse.

So like.

I’m seriously in hiding. It’s really boring.
EDIT 5 HOURS LATER:
I’m currently studying the dynamic relationships of felines. See I brought Fungi to my parents[I’m kind taking a mental stakeout here of sorts till after Christmas] and my parents already have three cats[including Killer who was MY cat but didn’t adjust well to apt. living]. Anyways I have been sitting in some pretty intense environments. Growling hissing hitting. Lily is the most psychotic of the bunch and I’m actually scared her. She hurt the vet so badly once that we were unable to get her shots and told with have to give her tranquilizers next time. Tippy is totally chill and doesn’t give a fuck in fact I took a nap using him as a pillow earlier. Killer is pissed off at Lily and Fungi but is otherwise ok. Fungi keeps going between scared shitless and no fear at all and attacked my mother once today. She’s also really excited about carpeting.
And in case that didn’t prove how bored I am. Here’s this:

Yep. Elfyourself.com.
Click here to see Frog, Yumna and I all as elves.
Thank god my parents have a fully stocked bar.
Love being Irish. Not only do they have a stocked bar. They have a literall bar. An actual room that is designated “bar.”
In fact I can’t remember ever living in a house without a bar.

Join NerdGirlX to see more of my porcelain asshole.

In non porn news the cut on my ass is really fucking sore. Fuck.

Soulsavles @ the Annex:

lovey

My apt:

My LOVES:

xo

Playing with Fungi:

She’s intense.

Also my kitchen floor after last night:

Yep that’s my blood. I have no idea how I bled so much and barely felt it. Oh wait it’s called whiskey. I’m a fucking idiot and am never doing dishes drunk again unless their plastic.

I got so drunk that I wasn’t allowed into Pacha. I fell down in front of Fat Baby and was so embarrassed that I ran down Rivington into a cab to my home.

I broke a glass and feel on it and slash my ass and legs and there’s blood all over my kitchen and I feel sick and sore. Like it’s disgusting it looks like I attempted to murder my ass in my kitchen. Just glass and blood.
N A S T Y

At least I’ll be in Fl with my girl Yumna in just over a week. Fuck I don’t give a shit about the holidays anymore, I just wanna get down to that wrenched state and see my girl.

Good Night

I just wanted to say Hi! to my readers @ indierotica.com where I am now syndicated.

To celebrate here are my favorite pictures Jess has taken of me:

My first jello shot! @ Nouveau back when that party existed.

The go go gets artistic

On a break.

MONEY MONEY MONEY MOTHERFUCKASSSSSSSSS

And lastly the infamous Brendon James Bitch portrait:

I leave you all with the news that tonight Frog is breaking my Pacha cherry and Trash will be back in January.

xo Baby

PS you see the feed here 

Dear people who hate me so much to leave comments like this:
“Jokes on You | haha@gmail.com | IP: 76.193.158.73

SO MUCH FOR BEING ~*~SO IN LOVE~*~

HAPPY HOLIDAYS, CUNT.”

A. I’m not approving them.
B. Jokes on you because you’re reading my blog despite your disdain for me. I mean really…why would you read my blog if you hate me?
C. I’m still in love with Wolf incase anyone is wondering but I’m going through a rough patch in my life and need time alone.

Where the fuck are the gunshots.
Fuck that.
MIA is still amazing though. And she’s hot.

I’m also feeling this:

God Pharrell is so hot. I’ve wanted to bone that man since I was like 12.

I’m not feeling that nervous breakdown I had last night after drinking too much whiksey in an attempt to deal with everything going on around me.
Pacha with Froggy, Oh and Britlyn tonightl, I’ve told to play nice with all the kids.

I’m going to go smoke cigarrette and read comics in the bath.

At this point in my life I think the only person I can love is myself.
Boyfriends always prove to be nothing worth having.

I think it might be time for me to leave
and thank god I have tickets to Fl on December 28…
I want my friends and family to be happy but I don’t know what to do.

Ok while I’m waiting to get hot water[apparentlly according to my super this may take 20minutes - WTF]. Lets celebrate camel toe:

Remember the days when we actually enjoyed seeing Spears camel toe:

Out of all fairness my own cameltoe:

Marc Jacobs does not celebrate the cameltoe:

Were you aware of the vast amount of websites devoted to cameltoe?

There’s rate cameltoes for those tired of kitten war. There’s cameltoe tv for those of you who really get off to it. Also cameltoe.org.

And of course, the infamous, Fannypack’s Camel Toe:

I still don’t have hot water. FUCK.

OK now POST PICTURES OF CAMELTOES IN THE COMMENTS!

I swear everytime I get freaked out and convince myself I might be preggors because my period is an hour, day, month late I go out and buy a test.
Within 24 hours of peeing on that fucking stick I always get my period.
Seriously what gives? And why don’t they make reusable tests? I hate blowing $10 to find out I’m not pregnate and don’t have to go through that bloddy mess that is abortions[pun intended].

Next time I have anxiety over the possiblity of having some disgusting featus in me I’m going to psyhch my vagina out. Fuck you vagina. I’m going to pee on a popcilce stick. And then get my period the next day.

Also whats with getting mad horny once your period starts? Seriously when I’m PMS-ing I want nothing to do with sex. Male, female, vibrator. I want nothing. The second my vagina becomes a blood donation center I want to fuck more than a rabbit.

And for anyone feeling nostalgic:

Periods are so annonying. You know in the porn industry we shove sponges up there when you have to do a scene on your period. Think of that next time your jerking off.

Also whats with alt. period shit like luna pads and the keeper/moon cup? I feel like I should get some and try them out for the sake of all women reading this blog. The idea of wearing a pad icks me out though. I don’t think I could roll with REUSEABLE pads. Cleaning my own menstrual cycle out of a pad…god I just don’t know about that. And the keeper. Having a cup in my vagina collecting my period blood. Apparently a lot of women take advatage of this and use it in art. I on the other hand think this would be a great opportunity to throw my menstrual blood at people I don’t like.

In non-menstrual news - I’m shooting a car calendar tommorow and am done with the semester!
Frog just called to hollar about a show tonight but instead I’m going to stay in and meditate about menstrual cycles.