I went to the dentist today at a clinic located in the Galleria mall in White Plains[aka the ghetto mall not the rich people mall].

One of the most worst visits ever. Not the top though because I’ve had visits where I literally started screaming and crying and had to be restrained. It was bad though because I was man handled and I do not like man handling unless it’s hot with hot people oh and consensual.

I do not like needles, sharp objects and ugly faces coming near my mouth.

So anyways apparently my problem with jaw clenching and tooth grinding[thank you a cocaine abuse, side effects from meds and a natural predisposition for this behavior] is what made my cap weak and fall out.
So I go to this clinic with my mom - the dentist is 30minutes late plus theres patients before me so I pass out. Wake up and get put in the room. This room is a feng sui disaster and the dentist office of my nightmares. Steel gray walls, old equiptment, no posters of happy teeth or oceans to look at. Just a cold steel gray corner. No windows. No way of escaping. And the chair is positioned away from the door so you have no fucking idea what could be coming up on you.

The doctor looks at my mouth, and my tooth and walks away. 5 minutes go by. I have no idea what is going on. 10 minutes go by. The secretaries and nurses are all conversing in either Spanish or Russian which is unnerving because I do not speak these languages[will some Spanish but it’s either basic shit or dirty talk…]. 30 minutes go by. Contemplate trying to find Klonapin in my bag because in my head I’m pretty much convinced this place might kill me. 36 minutes go by. I attempt to call my mother but finally the doctor and nurse walk in.

Mumbles something[he has a thick accent] about replacing my cap and post. HE HAS BLOOD ALL OVER HIS COAT AND MASK FROM ANOTHER PATIENT. Than he just GOES FOR IT. He just fucking takes my head, throws his right wrist on my forehead and than uses his hand to PRY my mouther fucking mouth open - he does this the whole VISIT and with FORCE. Than he just goes at my fucking mouth with one of those vibrating things and I’m like WOAH hold up WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOUR DOING. And he’s like oh you so sensitive oh calm down. This was pretty much the whole visit. The male nurse sucked at his job and kept accidentally grazing my fucking tit.

Than they decide to give me novacaine but not tell me. Luckily I see the fucking needle and start freaking out and have to fucking explain to them A no needles in my mouth especially without warning and B I can take the pain, I’ve been through this before it doesn’t hurt unless you don’t know how to do your job.

Now that it is established they start manhandeling me more. I’ve never felt more force from a dentist during a visit. He litterally took my legs and made them lie flat - nope doesn’t even ask me just fucking does it.

I was flipping out the whole time in my head and physically I was trying to get away while still trying to cooperate. Contemplating getting up and running the fuck out of there because I was convinced the place was unhygienic and they may be trying to kill me. Also I don’t appreciate being man handled. OR MOCKED - the man kept goading me oh why you so senstive stop being a baby.

When it was finally done[and it took forever - an hour] I came out of there furious. I ripped the bib off my self not wanting the nurse to touch me anymore than he had and stormed out. My mom was in shock - I rarely rarely every get mad like I was today.

It took me about five hours, a klonapin, whiskey and some bad tv to finally calm down after all this.

And you know what…I still kind of want to punch that motherfucking dentist.

Someone should buy me this scary tooth necklace, it represents a lot about my life.

Also people with fears of dentist should never watch The Dentist - shit fucked me up in the head even worse than I was already.